How I Feel About People Asking About Feminism
Let me be clear right off the bat: I am NOT a feminist. Yes, I think that women have the right to do whatever the hell they want, but I also believe that people are allowed to have an opinion about every topic. I have had my fair share of sexism thrust upon me, however instead of fighting against it with my bra burning on a stick and verbally castrating whoever it is that spout out such horrible words, I distance myself from them and prove them otherwise. The thing is I don’t feel like I need to prove that my sex has the capability to do anything I want. That’s what the women before me have done. No, what I’m set out to prove is that my generation of PEOPLE, not just women, are capable of doing anything.
That being said, I’m getting really tired of seeing people, not just men, question what feminism is, how they can help, why angry feminists are always so angry, and being verbally slaughtered because of it. I get it; some people just don’t understand feminism. Some of them are just making a joke. Some of them are being sarcastic and don’t know the tack of how to ask for real. But then again, some of the feminists aren’t helping those people who actually do want to understand feminism but instead dig up through the person’s old history of tweets or facebook posts that have some sort of sexist slur against women and call them a sexist. It’s just baffling to me that when someone asks for help, the people trying to “help” them immediately insult them and refuse to explain themselves. And even when they do explain themselves, sometimes it’s the most backwards explanation I’ve ever read. I don’t understand why as soon as someone brings up the term “feminism” people get very defensive and don’t actually read the true intent behind the words.
I don’t know. I might be the only one who’s getting tired of seeing hate spouted out on the social networks I reside on, but I don’t want to rage about it, nor do I want to be a peace-spouting hippy about it either. I just want people to be more understanding of one another, and it’s unfortunately not going to happen if everyone is so trigger happy with topics like this.
Feminism is about equality between the sexes. Unfortunately, I get the impression that too many people, on both sides, are so used to fighting that they’ve forgotten what they’re fighting for.
I can’t speak for Canada but there is some evidence that men and women are not being treated equally in the UK. Some employers still don’t pay men and women equally despite the fact that the legislation was passed in the 70s.[1] The majority of FT 100 SE companies do not have any women on their boards. I’ve noticed that in the organisations I’ve worked for: in the lower- and mid-management there are many women but there are few women at the upper levels.
Another problem is that the shrillest advocates are the ones who are likely to get noticed by the media so the pressure is on all advocates to be shrill.
There are still different expectations of men and women in many countries (including western ones). In fact the BBC World Service recently made a programme about it (I think it was broadcast last Sunday).[2] You may want to listen to Lucy Kellaway’s musings on the subject.[3]
[1] For example, Birmingham City Council can’t balance its books because of legal action that has only just been concluded (within the past 18 months).
[2] I haven’t heard the programme but it was mentioned in their Global News podcast.
[3] She’s an FT journalist who writes a weekly column (which is available as an audio podcast through iTunes, “Listen to Lucy”) that takes a wry look at management, its fads, jargon, etc. In the episodes where she covers the subject, she’s not so sure that there is a glass ceiling and, if there is one she tends to think that a large proportion of that could be self-imposed (she started her working career when things were a lot worse).
Re: Lucy Kellaway:
Then again, I may have to re-listen to them to make sure that I remembered what she said correctly.